Remission....it's not just a stage of healing, it's a state of mind... Kale style.

As many of you know, my father-in-law Jim, was diagnosed with Stage 4 Liver Cancer last Fall.  It took us all by surprise and we waited with intense trepidation with each report and test.  My husband, AJ, who is Jim's only offspring (I think AJ did him in on the idea of having more....!) began taking steps to be involved with his dad's fight against Cancer.  Jim underwent surgeries, chemo, and much more.

One thing Jim did NOT undergo, was a defeated attitude.  From the start Jim was very realistic, yet confident and firm in his resolution to beat what many thought was unbeatable.  When Jim was down for a visit several months ago, he told us that he told his doctor "I got two grandkids to watch grow up so I ain't fu*&%ng going anywhere!"  Despite how some people may feel, Jim had it right.  So many times I see people get diagnosed with Cancer, and they STOP.  They stop trying, loving, taking care of themselves, and living in general.  Jim never did that.  He did his chemo and went through the joys that come along with that, but he did it.  Meanwhile, he took time out to LIVE.  He went to Florida and laid back on a boat and soaked up some rays with his family and friends.  He came to Tennessee to see his family and laughed with his grandkids.   He continues to forge ahead with a bravery that is unmatched.  He may shrug it off and say "well, what the hell else am I gonna do??", but that is just Kale-speak for "I plan on kicking it's A#$ and then we'll eat!"  (Mind you, you may have hearing lose after this as well...they're very passionate about meal time and a whisper to them is more like a bull horn for most)

I am happy to say that as of yesterday...TEN MONTHS after being diagnosed with Stage 4 Liver Cancer....Jim is in remission!  Celebration?  Oh yes.  Relief? You bet your buns. Praise Jesus?  I'm on my knees.  My point is, Jim was determined to not let Cancer determine his life.  He let his life determine how much attention, no...dwelling, was spent on Cancer.  His state of mind was one of determination and drive, yet not forgetting to live life and enjoy the things that make you happy.  For Jim, it's his family and friends.  His life is centered around making everyone else happy, which in turns makes him happy.  We should all take on Jim's state of mind.

Remission is defined as "A diminution of the seriousness or intensity of disease or pain; a temporary recovery".  Temporary?  WHO CARES!  Because temporary is a very ambiguous time frame that I know Jim is going to take FULL advantage of!  And because of that, I know not only will AJ and I get to enjoy seeing Jim happy, but our two kids will get to see Grandpa Jim Bob living life and actually enjoying it, rather than putting one foot in the grave and waiting for the last rites to be read.

Remission may be a state of "temporary" healing...medically speaking that is.  BUT, I think in most situations, if we focus on the END result or desired outcome, it drives us to move faster and closer to it until we land right, smack in the middle of it.  Jim put his mind "in the state of remission" and therefore that is where he now exists, both mentally AND physically.  That's no feat people!  I am so proud to be Jim's daughter-in-law.  I draw courage from his strength and take pride in my husband and kids doing so as well.  Who else can say that they fought Stage 4 Liver Cancer and put it in remission in a mere 10 months??!!  Not many.

So Jim???  I salute, bow, hats off, high five, thumbs up, smile, and most of all hug you tonight!  Why?  Because you are so intricately sewn into the man I love, thus into my children.  I know I often use the line "I'm only here by marriage" as a wise-crack to dismiss something worthy of being dismissed, but truly I say to you, I have never been more proud to be a Kale.  We love you and can't wait to see you Grandpa Jim Bob!